Simon Says

From the director that brought us such clever classics (Sarcasm, can you dig it?) as Wild America and Angels in the Outfield, Director William Dear directs this straight to video slasher film. What makes a film horrible? It might be the lack of personal ambition put into a film but that seems hard to do anyways with a slasher film. This is a prime example of a film that undermines its own product thus creating a prompt and ultimately fun horror film.

The plot might sound very familiar so I give you a warning of repetition. A group of muscle bound, stoner, super attractive friends go into the country to camp and have premarital sex. Wow, how cleverly original. What starts off as a superimposed horror film turns brainsy and ballsy with the introduction to Crispin Glover. Crispin Glover plays Simon/Stanley, a double role with the normal ferocity and madness that accompanies every Glover role or film.

This stupid quintuplet of masculinity and naivety find themselves at a store in the middle of nowhere managed by the two brothers (Crispin Glover and Crispin Glover). Prior to this engagement, they meet up with two deus ex machina's who warn them of twins and murders. Of course, they don't listen. That decision should immediately be regretted. The body count rises due to flying pick axes.


So there is the typical plot twist and surprise ending, but I didn't find it annoying at all. It only made the film that more enjoyable. So, to answer your question. Was it bad? Yes it was bad, but that does not stop me from telling you to watch this film at all cost. You might hate it and spread words about how stupid it is but frankly, that is what it is about; Unbridled fun. William Dear has created a horror film that promotes alcoholism, subliminally telling you to crack open a cold one while watching this.

Now why should you see this one whereas ignore all the copycats? This film has a load of surprises. Grand scenery is one. The luscious outdoors were captured perfectly. As for the acting? Crispin Glover is a marvel on screen. He is truly an enigma on and off the set. His screams and signature anger spit are intact and creates the entire mood of the film.

Without Glover, this one would have fallen flat on its face. If you enjoy buckets of gore, Crispin Glover, stupid people being slaughtered, flying pick axes, or wicked CGI booby traps with more fake limbs to shake a stick at, I definitely recommend this film. Just don't take it too seriously. Er.. Simon says don't take it too seriously.

-mAQ