Hatchet

I've only linked the term "red-blooded" towards film a minuscule amount of occasions. One being Jeremiah Johnson and the other being There Will Be Blood. The very idea of American citizens calling Hatchet a distinctive "American" horror film is insulting. Hatchet is anti patriotic in every sense and a low blow to rural America in the guise of a contemporary slasher farce. Hatchet isn't very "old school" or "mind-blowing" as other critics hailed it but Hatchet is constantly entertaining and manages to be something unheard of in its genre - truly funny.

Joel David Moore plays the main "hero" of sorts. He is a charming yet awkward man attempting to get over a love once lost. Together with his token black friend, they decide to escape from the crowded streets of New Orleans by taking a haunted swamp ride hosted by none other than that Asian in Better Luck Tomorrow. From the opening credits, what wraps around a pleasing horror spoof is a circle jerk horror icon fest. We have constant cameos of Kane Hodder, Tony Todd, and Robert Englund. I wouldn't be surprised if Douglas Bradley was key grip.


The villainous creature Victor Crowley is a barbaric inbred who misses his daddy. He's stuck in the same horrific night as the one in which his father died, so he stalks all the trespassers, murdering them in various grotesque ways. It's blatantly obvious that the name Crowley was derived from infamous occultist Aleister Crowley, who was also referenced and defeated in Playstation video game Nightmare Creatures. If it weren't the comic effect, this film would be nothing but a horrible homage to the slasher genre. Thankfully, the film has the technical footnote on call and manages to amuse, both in terror and humor.


Many of the fine folks at my employment lighten up the day with many various "inside jokes" relevant only to the regs. of our theater. It came as a great surprise to see many of our jokes used in action to such an advantage. Many scenes actually made me spit up with laughter. Hatchet isn't something new, but the creative arrogance behind the films production certainly allows it to stand above the rest. Hatchet isn't a revelation in horror and it's a cocky piece of cinema violence, very similar to Feast, but Hatchet has an equivocal beauty about it. By no means an art piece, what you see is what you get in what might be the most shallow horror film to date. That doesn't mean it isn't immensely entertaining though.

-mAQ