Never in my life had I planned to watch any of this film other than the trailers we received that I promptly trashed and threw a smirk at the garbage with a hint of sadistic glee. While closing up at our theater, I had several minutes to spare, so I began my perilous trek into theater 1. The movie had just started. I hesitated for a second, sweat building at my brow. My fingers cramping up. Could this be the feeling of death creeping up on my back?
I slowly sat down into the back so I wouldn't absorb all of the film at once. Visual pain happens to be real; proven so by Freidberg & Seltzer. These are the guys that should scare you, not German mogul Uwe Boll. As the film opened with a CGI rendering of earth morphing into an asteroid and the title of the film exploding on screen, I realized where much of the 20 million dollar budget went. I already can't believe people fund this shit.
A retarded running gag of cows falling on Pop Culture icons.
I sat through a tedious and yawn-rendering spoof of 10,000 B.C., then watched that turn into a spoof of American Gladiators, then Amy Winehouse, Indiana Jones, then something else that had no relation to disaster movies. I feel my stomach slowly turning in it's rightful place. Soon some douche bag model wakes up in his bed. What starts as a slight odor of a plot, Flavor of Love is soon spoofed, followed by several other television shows and Soulja Boy. Cue the vomit arising in my mouth.
faggots.
I sat through around 15 to 20 minutes of this mind-numbing inane film and morally retarded filth and all I got was a vomit stain on my t-shirt. The ONLY parts that amused me: The No Country for Old Men spoof, and the non-stop Juno mocking. Juno had it coming. I feel slightly unable to perform my natural motor skills. I love working at a theater for every reason other than this. I should start working on rigging a death trap for anyone who buys a ticket for this film. I walked out after that 15 minutes of purgatory. I sat silent during the car ride home.
I slowly sat down into the back so I wouldn't absorb all of the film at once. Visual pain happens to be real; proven so by Freidberg & Seltzer. These are the guys that should scare you, not German mogul Uwe Boll. As the film opened with a CGI rendering of earth morphing into an asteroid and the title of the film exploding on screen, I realized where much of the 20 million dollar budget went. I already can't believe people fund this shit.
A retarded running gag of cows falling on Pop Culture icons.I sat through a tedious and yawn-rendering spoof of 10,000 B.C., then watched that turn into a spoof of American Gladiators, then Amy Winehouse, Indiana Jones, then something else that had no relation to disaster movies. I feel my stomach slowly turning in it's rightful place. Soon some douche bag model wakes up in his bed. What starts as a slight odor of a plot, Flavor of Love is soon spoofed, followed by several other television shows and Soulja Boy. Cue the vomit arising in my mouth.
faggots.I sat through around 15 to 20 minutes of this mind-numbing inane film and morally retarded filth and all I got was a vomit stain on my t-shirt. The ONLY parts that amused me: The No Country for Old Men spoof, and the non-stop Juno mocking. Juno had it coming. I feel slightly unable to perform my natural motor skills. I love working at a theater for every reason other than this. I should start working on rigging a death trap for anyone who buys a ticket for this film. I walked out after that 15 minutes of purgatory. I sat silent during the car ride home.
-mAQ
this film has made about 7 million dollars in north america which means about 1 million idiots went to see it, but just think about that for a moment, 299 million americans have proved they were not idiots simply by not going to see it. That means that only 0.3% of americans are idiots which is astonishing when you consider the fact that in england a whopping 60 million people are idiots, a staggering 100% of the population, you americans should feel thankful that you only possess a tiny fraction of the levels of idiocy and stupitidy possessed by your british counterparts.
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