Saturday, May 24, 2014

Some Call It Loving




Long before becoming an auteur of ostensibly classy softcore flicks like Two Moon Junction (1988) and Wild Orchid (1989), Zalman King (who was born Zalman King Lefkowitz, but decided to change his name when he started acting so as to obscure his Hebraic background) starred in a true lost gem of a film entitled Some Call It Loving (1973) aka Sleeping Beauty aka Dream Castle directed by James B. Harris (The Bedford Incident, Fast-Walking) that would teach him everything he needed to know about creating aesthetically pleasing and orgasmically oneiric works of celluloid erotica. Directed by a little known sometimes filmmaker who is probably best known nowadays for being the producer of early black-and-white Stanley Kubrick films like The Killing (1956) and Paths of Glory (1957), Some Call It Loving was apparently dreamed up by Harris while he was working on Lolita (1962), although it would take over a decade before the film started production, so one can only assume it was a dream project of sorts for its director. Based on the short story Sleeping Beauty by John Collier—a British writer/screenwriter whose works were adapted for a number of popular horror-themed TV series, including Alfred Hitchcock Presents, The Twilight Zone, and Tales of the UnexpectedSome Call It loving is a decidedly dark and even disconcerting yet elegnant aesthetically exquisite romance of the dream-logic-oriented sort that falls somewhere between a Gothic Hitchcockian melodrama and the arthouse realm as a sort of anti-fairytale for adults and Last Year at Marienbad (1961) for people that cannot stomach French intellectual twaddle. Although virtually completely unknown today and totally unavailable in home media format, the film has been lauded by a number of highly respected film critics, including Jonathan Rosenbaum, who stated of the work in his classic text Midnight Movies (1983): “James B. Harris’s neglected and all but unknown SOME CALL IT LOVING, based on a John Collier story, “Sleeping Beauty”—a movie about the processes and consequences of erotic dreaming, with a swell score and a great early performance by Richard Pryor—would make a perfect midnight attraction. Like many other rare gems, it might even develop a cult, if given half an opportunity.” Of course, the film was never given a chance and remains just as obscure today as it was when it was first released over four decades ago. While Some Call It Loving was such a hit in Europa upon its release that director James B. Harris was invited to attend the quite honorable "Directors Fortnight" at the 1973 Cannes Film Festival and present the film, Some Call It Loving was naturally trashed by philistine critics in the United States and received next to no release in American theaters, hence the work’s undeserved obscurity. A work that apparently was an influence on Eyes Wide Shut (1999) and, in my less than humble opinion, is infinitely more interesting than Kubrick’s somewhat similarly themed work Lolita, Some Call It Loving is a (non)love story in quasi-fetishistic filmic fairytale form that was made for those individuals that have who have fallen in love, only to be demystified of such illusions when reality appeared in its typically ruthless fashion.  Indeed, if you plan to watch the film so you can wank off to Tisa Farrow's tits, you might be in for a rude awakening and/or a ruined orgasm.



 Robert Troy (Zalman King) is all by his lonesome at a carnival and finds himself enticed by an attraction advertising a ‘Sleeping Beauty’ of sorts. Indeed, a carny ‘Carnival Doctor’ (Logan Ramsey) claims that the sleeping beauty in question, Jennifer (Played by Mia Farrow’s much more attractive, if not less talented, sister Tisa Farrow) has been supposedly asleep for 8 years. For one single dollar, patrons can attempt to awaken the slumbering angelic beauty with a big juicy kiss, but as the good Carnival Doctor warns, “To wake the Sleeping Beauty, you run the risk of being awakened yourself.” The Sleeping Beauty certainly awakens something in Robert, as he offers the carny Doctor $20,000 on the spot for the living carnival attraction after spending some private time with her and realizing that he has more or less fell in love with her at first sight (when Robert initially asks the Carny to see the Sleeping Beauty in private, the Doc yells at him for making such a ‘moral proposition’, but when he offers him $50, that all changes, with the sleazy flesh-peddler saying he can do whatever he wants with her, “no questions asked”). Robert brings Jennifer aka ‘Sleeping Beauty’ home in a hearse and immediately tells his two girlfriends, Scarlett (British actress Carol White) and Angelica (Veronica Anderson), who are making love together in bed, that he has acquired a real live Sleeping Beauty and he plans to wake her up, as if that is an everyday occurrence. Indeed, Robert, who is a saxophone player in a degenerate jazz band, lives in a baroque mansion where he is in ménage à trios of sorts, but now the only thing he can think of is Jennifer, even though he knows nothing about her aside from the fact that thousands upon thousands of horny men have defiled her body over the past 8 years or so. Although he lives a life of luxury in a majestic mansion that seems like it was taken straight out of a classic storybook, Robert’s only friend is a belligerent negro wino named Jeff (portrayed by Richard Pryor in a rather humorous, if not superlatively self-degrading role), who enjoys drawing hearts over urinals and whose liver is about to explode. Despite the fact that Robert does everything he can for Jeff, the jigaboo dipsomaniac is an ingrate, even making the following complaint after his friend attempts to give him a ride home: “I’m a man now, you wanna get down? Because you help me with some bills and took me to the doctor, I owe you something?! Huh, nigga?!” 



 Needless to say, when Sleeping Beauty finally wakes up and says “hello,” Robert is in pure heaven and he immediately treats his new dream lover to an extravagant tap dance routine that is performed with pure Sapphic passion by Scarlett and Angelica. More than anything, Robert is deeply enamored with Jennifer’s childlike innocence and purity, as if she is indeed a real living and breathing undefiled dame from a fairytale. To humor her curious childlike ways, Robert plays hide-and-go-seek with Jennifer around the mansion, though she has a somewhat hard time playing due to the fact that she is confined to a wheelchair as her legs are quite weak from being immobile for 8 years. Meanwhile, Scarlett and Angelica play erotically-charged role-playing games around the house, including pretending to be nuns in a monastery and a master-and-slave scenario (not only is Scarlett the master of the game, but she is also the real master of the house). Since Scarlett is in charge, everyone does what she says, including Robert, who is a sort of unofficial cuckold, though he is getting tired of the lifestyle. When Robert introduces Jennifer to Jeff, the black bum, who is like a virtual walking-and-talking minstrel show, makes a joke that the little lady is ‘passing’ for white and that she is a Siamese twin who “used to be connected to a black chick because you’re black and tan.” Over time, Robert begins calling Jennifer his little “jellybean” and even tells her that he loves her. Jennifer then reveals that she feels like “It’s like a dream…like I’m not completely awake yet” and reveals to Robert how she was kissed and molested by countless old dirty men when she was asleep. Coming to the conclusion that Jennifer thinks he is someone that he is not and that he wants to do everything he can to preserve her purity and their relationship, Robert decides that he and his beloved will move out of the mansion, but when he tells queen bitch Scarlett about his plans, she makes the following typically female passive aggressive threat: “I don’t want to lose you Robert, so whatever it is I have to do to keep you here…I’m going to do it.” Of course, Robert ends up staying and Scarlett begins incorporating Jennifer in her perverted role-playing games, including a scenario where they trick the Jazz musician into thinking their engaging in lurid lesbo sex. Bummed out, Robert talks to Jeff, even telling the black bum he envies him because nothing surprises him, remarking: “you’re not surprised if you piss your pants or don’t piss at all. You wake up in the gutter instead of your bed…that doesn’t surprise you either. In fact, you wouldn’t be surprised if you didn’t even wake up at all one morning, would you? You want to know why you wouldn’t be surprised?...Because you don’t have any choice and that’s why I envy you.” Needless to say, Jeff drops dead one day and Robert and his girlfriends are the only ones who attend his funeral. In a pathetic attempt to get over his fanatical obsession with Jennifer, Robert pays a barmaid a wad of cash to pretend to be a cheerleader and do some naughty naked cheers for him, but she does not exactly cheer him up and he walks out of the bar mid-performance. Ultimately, Robert gives up on love and decides to make Jennifer a sleeping beauty again by slipping something into her wine (the carny who sold her to him revealed he kept her asleep with some sort of liquid medication). Ironically, in the end, Robert becomes just like the sleazy ‘Carnival Doctor’ who sold Jennifer to him, offering strangers the chance to wake her up with a kiss, but warning them: “To wake the Sleeping Beauty, you run the risk of being awakened yourself.” 



 Undoubtedly, I could relate to Some Call It Loving protagonist Robert to some degree, especially in regard to his concern that the untainted Sleeping Beauty has no idea what kind of person he really is, as his love and infatuation has caused him to act in a manner that he never thought he was capable of, hence the warning from the Carny: “To wake the Sleeping Beauty, you run the risk of being awakened yourself.” I have certainly fallen in love with a girl before that was so blinded by her love for me that she chose to see what she wanted to see and ignored the rest, only to eventually have the spell broken and come to her senses in the end. Indeed, with the film’s inclusion of the Nat King Cole song “The Very Thought of You,” Some Call It Loving lets the viewer known in a somewhat esoteric way how love, or even an obsession with the idea of love, can make a person do innately irrational things that they would never fathom doing had they not been intoxicated with amore. Like a more romantic and less autistic David Lynch flick meets a post-counter-culture take on The Twilight Zone, Some Call It Loving is certainly a singular piece of celluloid that is begging to be unearthed. A sophisticated and rarely silly adult fairytale that will appeal to casualties of love that is never sentimental or heavy-handed, Some Call It Loving is like a nostalgic film for the anti-nostalgic, as a work that reminds one what it feels like to be in love, but then smacks the viewer across the face with the bitter and soul-draining conclusion that comes with lost love. Needless to say, I have no desire to wake up a Sleeping Beauty and if I need a reminder why, I can just re-watch Some Calling It Loving and be also reminded why Kubrick’s relatively unknown producer should have probably been the one who directed Lolita



-Ty E

17 comments:

  1. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 2:36 PM

    Exactly, because then Sue Lyon would`ve appeared completely naked...WOW ! ! !.

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  2. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 3:00 PM

    I want to bugger Brandy Herred, the cheerleader, (as the bird was at the time this film was made, not as the bird is now obviously).

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  3. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 3:02 PM

    I want to bugger Tisa Farrow (as the bird was in 1969 when the bird was 18, not as the bird is now obviously).

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  4. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 3:07 PM

    What the hell were Richard Pryor and that British slag Carol White doing in this movie ?, they seemed so out of place.

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  5. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 3:13 PM

    Ty E, the idea of love is a ludicrously out-moded anachronism from a thankfully by-gone era (it was always a lie and deception to begin with), all you have to do now is shove your knob up as girl-y girls bums as possible, its so great how all that absurd emotional bull-shit from the past has now been thankfully and finally replaced with pure animal lust, its the greatest thing thats ever happened ! ! !.

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  6. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 3:17 PM

    So Ty E, that bird you were talking about was only able to overlook the fact that you`re a Nazi for so long before she finally realised she didn`t want to become a fully paid-up twat-er of The Third Reich ! ! !.

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  7. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 3:32 PM

    Ty E, you know the pictures from the film that you chose to illustrate the reveiw with, why couldn`t they have all been of Brandy Herred spinning around and showing her incredible arse as her dress blew up ! ! !, i used to have a copy of the film on VHS but i wore out that section of the tape where Brandy is twirling around and showing her bum because i jerked off to it hundreds of times in the freeze frame mode, that birds arse was so amazing when her dress blew-up and the camera was looking right up her stunning bum (great choice of shot and camera place-girl-t from Harris ! ! !), every frame was a masturbation-aid par-excellence, i thought you might have at least showed one picture of Brandys arse Ty E, just for me, maybe you could add in an extra picture the way you sometimes do, i`d really appreciate it my old mate ! ! !, that girls bum really was one of THE greatest masturbation-aids of all-time ! ! !.

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  8. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 3:46 PM

    Its quite a long time since i`ve seen this film Ty E, but when i was reading the reveiw i didn`t really re-twat-er any of the story, all i re-twat-ered was Brandy Herreds incredible arse when the bird was spinning around doing the naked cheerleader bit, freeze frame on every frame of that sequence Ty E and tell me in all honesty if you`ve ever seen a bird with a more incredible bum ! ?, for you not to show a shot of her arse in this reveiw was unforgivable. You girl-tioned Tisa Farrows tits when instead you should`ve been raving endlessly about Brandy Herrods ass-tonishing arse-hole ! ! !. Imagine buggering Brandy Herred (as the bird was in 1973 obviously) non-stop 24 hours a day for 50 years and spunking up her bum every 5 minutes (without the bird aging obviously), that would equate to a lottery win and a living breathing trip to a literal heaven on earth ! ! !.

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  9. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 6:02 PM

    Ty E, i know what you`re thinking my old mucker, why is The Hamster so desperate to see a picture of Brandy Herreds bum when hes got thousands of hard-core clips of gorgeous sexy young girls being buggered and sodomized to jerk-off to, not forgetting of course hundreds of pictures of Pauline Hickey, Heather O`Rourke, JonBenet Ramsey and Cindy Hinds to cater to his masturbatory needs as well ! ?, and you`d be right my old mate, its just that during those days of appalling masturbatory desperation (before i finally got access to 'The Real McCoy', as it were) when i was randomly (and usually unfortunately completely forlornly) recording hundreds of late night movies off of television in the hope of capturing twat, tits, and arse that i could jerk-off to in the freeze frame mode, Brandy Herrods bum really was one of those legendary mo-girl-ts that made all the other disappoint-girl-ts bearable, i`ve never forgotton that birds truly ass-tonishing arse and what a truly classic and almost unrivalled wanking-aid it was, that old VHS copy has long since gone and the clip doesn`t seem to be available anywhere on the internet, so how about making my day Ty E by posting a picture of Brandys amazing arse (as you should have done in the first place, you know that my old mate ! ! !), please, pretty please. Brandy Herred twirling around showing her bum, what an amazing sequence that is to watch frame by frame, one of the truly great masturbation-aids that girl-aged to circumvent "THE TIME OF SEXUAL REPRESSION" ! ! !.

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  10. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 6:09 PM

    Ty E, "La Drolesse" (1979) has been downloaded on YouTube, time to finally give your opinion on Madeleine Desdevises, the Frog Heather O`Rourke ! ! !.

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  11. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 6:12 PM

    Thats a great picture of Brandy Herred that you`ve posted, BUT I WANT TO SEE HER BUM Ty E, I WANT TO SEE HER BUM ! ! !.

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  12. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 6:28 PM

    Tisa Farrow has certainly appeared in a lot of cult items, perhaps enough to become another darling of this site ! ! !. By the way, i dont know about her being more attractive but less talented than her sister Mia, i think they`re about the same in both depart-girl-ts (when they were younger of course, now they`re both old slags).

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  13. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 6:34 PM

    I want to bugger they`re mother, Maureen O`Sullivan (as the bird was in 1929 when the bird was 18, not as the bird is now obviously, which is long since dead, unfortunately). The bird looked like Jane Fonda when she was a young bird. By the way, Johnny Weissmuller is a pile of horse-shit.

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  14. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 6:53 PM

    Ty E, do you re-twat-er when Zal-girl King guest starred in an episode of "Land of the Giants" circa 1970 ?, i wonder if he was lucky enough to bugger Deanna Lund and Heather Young on the set ! ?. I also liked that scene in "Trip with the Teacher" (1975) when he anally raped that relatively unattractive 35 year-old slag who was supposed to be looking after the younger birds, like i said even though the bird wasn`t that tasty she did look so vulerable and defenseless, thats why perhaps it was such a turn-on when that lucky bastard King poked his willy up her bum, the fucking lucky sod.

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  15. I think the average price to see a movie in North America is around $8, by my reckoning thats about $7.95 to much, a dime would be more appropriate ! ! !.

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  16. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 7:33 PM

    Zal-girl King snuffed it on February 3rd 2012, just 2 days after the 24th anniversary of Heather snuffing it.

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  17. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 24, 2014 at 7:41 PM

    Just on the subject of love, I`m in love with Heather O`Rourke (and i know shes in love with me), isn`t that totally perfect ! ! !.

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