Saturday, December 20, 2008

Jigga Jones


I normally stray from the temptation of creative film writings while intoxicated. When I watched internet meme Jiggaboo Jones' film Jigga Jones several days ago, I owed it to myself to pick up myself some O.E., slam it back, and write about my racial learnings in the heart of a forged urban environment where the streets can kill you. For the general population who hasn't heard of him, he's an African man parading around in a Jheri curl talkin' bout some bitches and hoes, based solely on his existing fan base. Far from post-blaxploitation, Jigga Jones is a caricature of African's while not quite being pro-White.


In this barely feature length film, we follow a first person perspective of a documentation on Jiggaboo Jones. This ex-con has recruited a camera man (ala Man Bites Dog) to film him while he robs, jacks, snatches, flips, twists, and hustles the common man, all for a buck. The original edit of this film would have been made notorious, for it featured around 700 curse words, which would have propelled it into the number one profane film on retail distribution. They didn't, but with this current cut, I learned how to make the "$1.89" which might be an experiment I myself might partake in.



The "$1.89" is a weapon for thugs with little to no money, or any dawg that simply loves to cause unexpected destruction. This recipe of death follows this mold. Acquire an empty soda bottle, preferably a dark cola. Spray paint the inside a black color with a couple coats. Purchase a 12 inch metal rod, insert it into the bottle after drilling two holes near the bottom, then fill with cement. As Jiggaboo Jones explains, what you are now equipped with is not only a devastating weapon, but one that disguises its wielder as a soda-loving nigga, that is, until he attacks and unwittingly steals all your cash.


Jigga Jones is a short film. One should be advised to not pay full price for this film. While being hilarious, an urban satire, and an all-out attack on the "Definitive" black culture, this is far too short to spend full price on. In comparison, The Dragonball Z "films" that barely clock in at 48 minutes that have you paying up to 17 dollars a piece. Jigga Jones is entertaining and happens to teach you homegrown and sarcastic street smarts. If anyone is stupid enough to reenact anything in this film, they deserve the jail time. This is worth your time if given the chance. Jiggaboo Jones will always be "the #1 nigger in America".
Kill Whitey.


-mAQ

1 comment:

  1. i was just wondering how two partial aryans felt about the fact that a partial black man is about to be sworn in as president of the united states?

    ReplyDelete