Thriller - A Cruel Picture

Only such a cultured nation such as Sweden could produce an exploitation of such high caliber as Thriller - A Cruel Picture. A film that features eye gouging, hardcore sex, and heroin addiction has never been so splendid. The lovely Christina Lindberg was the perfect woman to cast as the one-eyed woman seeking revenge against a sadistic pimp, a lesbian, and a handful of other social degenerates. Lindberg plays a young woman that was molested as a child which has turned her into a mute. When she becomes a young adult, she is abducted by a suave sicko who turns her into a drug addicted sex slave for him to prostitute out money.

Excessively annoying and played out hack Quentin Tarantino stole a few elements of Thriller - A Cruel Picture for his over stylized trash Kill Bill films. Despite featuring pornography and extremely offensive material, Thriller - A Cruel Picture has more artistic integrity than all of Tarantino’s films combined. Tarantino may not know how to make an original film, but every once in a while he knows the right film to steal from. Quentin Tarantino even had enough respect for Thriller - A Cruel Picture that he allowed director Bo Arne Vibenius to have a cameo in Kill Bill as a food vendor.

Director Bo Arne Vibenius made the right choice when he decided to make his lead character a mute. Christina Lindberg has enough power in her beauty and glance to keep the viewer focused on the screen. This raped and abused woman has every right to torture and kill her victimizers. Instead of entering a state of comatose, this stunning one eye trains to kill and she kills well. I especially liked how scenes of violent revenge featured in Thriller - A Cruel Picture are in slow-motion. One has to savor One Eye's art of killing.

Apparently director Bo Arne Venius used a real cadaver for the scene in which Lindberg's charcter has her eye gouged out. This offensive scene only further confirms Thriller - A Cruel Picture as one of the best, if not the best, rape/revenge exploitation films. The reality is that most exploitation films are pure garbage with little to no redeeming quality. As a whole, Thriller - A Cruel Picture is a masterpiece of the unofficial genre. The film is one of the neglected (for obvious reasons) treasures of cinema history.

-Ty E

Karate for Life

Bringing the series to a close, Oyama got the film treatment he deserved. Karate for Life contains the same ingredients as the other films; epic battles and touching moments of humanity. Karate for Life opens up with a humongous bang. Sonny Chiba walks into a dojo and challenges the sensei to a duel to showcase his full-contact brand of karate. He then defeats over 100 warriors even after they cheat and manages to stab the sensei's eye out with his index finger.


Karate for Life is the closing chapter that Oyama needs, but the ending still leaves many possibilities. The films never chronicled the rise of his fighting style or the other events that occurred. The film transpires over a small amount of time when Oyama was a thug and bodyguard stretching to his moments with children. Oyama is a great father figure and I myself wouldn't mind getting my ass handed to me by him for a righteous discipline.


Oyama engages in a ridiculous and often humorous job of professional wrestling. He is part of a team that points jests towards the Japanese. Due to Oyama's fighting spirit, he cannot fix a match and gets over his head with mobsters and sharks. The scenes of professional wrestling fixate on the American military in the crowd hollering a fierce chant warranting death. Surely the Japs think little of us, but portraying us as rabid animals is taking it a bit far.


From what I've written on the previous films, not much changes. The film plots stay perfectly linear and the director doesn't like to sample change. I can't say much more than I've previously written but the Oyama trilogy is one of the best martial arts series' ever made. It's unfortunate that his saga wasn't continued past three films and that Sonny Chiba has aged past his prime.

-mAQ

Rollerball (2002)

I'm an action junkie, plain and simple. Most of these Hollywood churn-outs over the years have managed to entertain me. None of them can stand up to the classics, but I am always satiated with an ample dose of chases, explosions, and vulgarity. My adrenaline drive is what I need quick fixes for and this is why I go out of my way at times to watch something I don't expect anything from but merriment.


From the director of the greatest action films of all time, Die Hard's John McTiernan has an illustrious and short filmography. Rather than quantity over quality, his short run has provided massive enjoyment for fans of any genre. In fact, I didn't even realize how many of my childhood favorites he directed. We got Predator, Die Hard, Last Action Hero, and Die Hard with a Vengeance. McTiernan has developed into a shallow reflection of what he used to be.

Yes. I hate your film too.

With a cast of Chris Klein, LL Cool J, and some dame with weird eyebrows, I found this film to be tipping the scale of depravity for its innocent viewers. Chris Klein is that annoying douche on American Pie. It's rather relieving to see him in a film where he wouldn't be a douche. Well, what do you know? He's still a douche, but this time in the future. LL Cool J is a horrible rapper and actor but somehow I am still drawn to his works as I am to Bruce Willis' blues album, but sadly his lack of acting talent isn't exploited.


10 minutes into the film, I discovered that they erased any socio-political ties that the original film held and just made an extreme sports film for the MTV gene pool. I find Rollerball (2002) to be in that same category of Extreme Ops. Don't remember that film? Me either. With the pleasant surprise of including Jean Reno in this film as the villainous Russian tycoon Petrovich, I found his character and charisma underused as I watched them run his character into the ground. While this film pertained to boldly debasing the Russian population, I'm surprised the cast wasn't crucified.

Picture related.

With all this in mind, expect a 15 minute action scene filmed entirely in night vision. That's correct. Of all the vapid ideas for visual excitement and yearning to think "outside the box", this has to be one of the worst ideas since Blade Runner 2. Rollerball (2002) is a film that should have never been made. It is one of the worst Hollywood films I've seen in ages. Boring, bland, and led by a cast of buffoons, this films only achievement is to ruin John McTiernan's reputation.

-mAQ

The Return of the Living Dead

Over the years, my “love” for the horror genre has waned. I find my stomach turning when I hear that an old classic is being remade or another sequel is in the works. One of my all time favorite horror films of the 1980s is the classic Return of the Living Dead. The film, of course, has an abundance of horrible and banal sequels that always trick horror fans into watching them. I guess it is just hard to deal with the fact that none of the many sequels can come even close to “living” up to the original.

I listen to the song Party Time by 45 Grave anytime that I want to reflect on the film without actually watching it. Death-rock and the horror film is a splendid match made in hell. Return of the Living Dead has one of the best soundtracks to ever compliment a horror film. The Cramps, The Damned, The Flesh Eaters, and T.S.O.L. (unfortunately not the original line-up) add a certain fun eerie sound to an already competent horror flick. The punk rockers featured in Return of the Living Dead, for once, actually have music that compliments their aesthetic.

She also experiences her fantasy of being ripped apart by a bunch of old (and dead) men. When Trash comes back as a zombie, she is easily the most erotic zombie to ever grace the scratched silver screen. A homeless man learns the hard way when he becomes hypnotized by the newly rotting beauty. Why can’t the recent flood of mediocre and worthless zombie films feature such salacious zombies?

I never thought that featuring slapstick humor in a zombie film would actually be successful. There is nothing I hate more than the horror comedy, but Return of the Living Dead does is solidly. Over the years, the one liners of zombies have stuck in my mind and I can’t complain. After all demanding “MORE BRAINS!!” is something you expect to hear from a zombie and the tarman zombie says it well. The torso of a rotten and topless blonde lets the audience know her fancy is, "not people, BRAINS!” This zombie has always had a close place in my heart.

Night of the Living Dead author John Russo was able to keep the “living dead” dead for his future cinema ventures, while director George S. Romero has to come up with different names for his sequels. Although Return of the Living Dead isn’t an official sequel to Night of the Living Dead, it is a nice comedic and reflexive companion piece to the first film. I would even go as far as saying that I find Return of the Living Dead to be more entertaining than Romero’s sequel Dawn of the Dead. Return of the Living Dead has aged elegantly whereas Dawn of the Dead has just aged.

-Ty E

Black Rage

I welcome cinematic oddities with open arms. Anything outside of conventions, I will take in under my loving wing. Sometimes, you got to learn how to just say no to films. Today, I'm spitting in the face of a film called Black Rage. As cunning and nonsensical the plot is, there should have been more to it or at least some of this promised Negro fury. I wanted to see a slave thug out into his societal standpoint of the present. All I got was the white director playing an "albino nigger".


Chris Robinson served as the director, co-writer, and star of this film also known as Charcoal Black. The storyline was in print. 2 black men uncover a entirely illegible treasure map consisting of tiny bones which serve no purpose. When their Bronson-looking "massa" takes the map from them, the white black guy charges him, steals the map, and takes his black brother on a quest through a swamp to uncover hypothetical treasure.


If you haven't figured it out by now, this screenplay wholly resembles the Coen Brother's film O Brother, Where Art Thou ? which was based on a poem entitled The Odyssey. I can agree personally with the Coen's adaptation but I frown infinitely upon Robinson's attempt. While scavenging for information regarding this film, I stumbled upon an iMDB review stating that his friend got ill from watching this film. Funny, I fell asleep in the credits and woke up with a migraine.

In the end, I was in a hallucinogenic haze. I didn't know where I was or who I was. More importantly, the only thing that I could remember was the ending of this film, or lack thereof. They do not find the treasure, his white "nigger brother" was killed in an extremely pussified shootout that went as far as to calculating reload times and slave and master form some form of cinematic bond which would be more controversial than Song of the South. All in all, this film struck me as a wannabe blaxploitation film that tried too hard to integrate races and cease conflicts.


For a self-proclaimed adventure film, not much goes on. This has almost zero entertainment value. You visually peruse through the characters attempting to find some golden detail you missed but it all falls flat. None of these characters are appealing, none of the action is entertaining, and the racial boundary it attempts to flutter over never existed. Whiteface it isn't. Just some crusty old white guy. How disappointing.

-mAQ

Karate Bear Fighter

Karate Bear Fighter is the second film in the Masutatsu Oyama trilogy preceded by the aforementioned Karate Bull Fighter. In this pulp martial arts biography, Sonny Chiba plays the legendary Oyama who has killed man & beast at separate points of his life. His fists are lightning fast and his apathy for human life knows no bounds. This is but a continuation of the first film. Intended for timeline viewers only.

Oyama continues his quest for personal enlightenment and ultimately becomes the most bad ass zen guy around. He trains under raging waterfalls to heighten his tolerance and to discover what a wise man said to him about a presence of a circle. Oyama is portrayed fluently by Shinichi Chiba. Sonny Chiba's height of 5'9 attacks Asian height standards in film allowing Chiba to stand tall over any fighter giving a visual menacing advantage.


The portions of these films are divided in a spirtual pie graph. Each film in this trilogy features amazing martial arts action and violence that is gratifying and flammable. As soon as the "one man against a mob" scenes are over, switch to a touching side story of how Oyama has deceived someone in someway and temporarily sets out to touch a humans life in some way. This film is deeply engrossing in more than one manner.

Alcoholic.

Hausu was another Japanese masterpiece and in no way is connected to this film, but the choice of bright settings links them together. Although Hausu had pastel horizons, Karate Bear Fighter gave a foreboding shallowness to the country of Japan. Kill or be killed; Chiba's universal tagline of revenge and brutality is no stranger to these pulp biographies.


Now for the role of exploitation and foreshadowing, One could guess that Chiba gets in a fight with a bear and this is true. In no way as remarkable or graphic as the makeshift matador scene in the prior film, this time around, the animal cruelty is limited to Chiba punching the creature into a cyclops. I preferred the bull battle to be honest.


Karate Bear Fighter is the middle man of a trilogy. With one more to go, I continually find more and more appreciation for the man that was named Oyama. I noticed his counterpart is heavily glamorized as Chiba was to play an overweight role. Nonetheless, If you've seen Karate Bull Fighter, watch this sequel for a direct continuation. If you haven't seen any of them, drop what you are doing and pick up copies now.

-mAQ

Kids

Kids, Larry Clark's debut film, is still the best film by the perverted director. The film also made a name for Harmony Korine. Korine’s cameo in Kids as a drug distributing raver is also a memorable thing to see. I think I would give Korine more credit with the creation of Kids as he introduced Larry Clark to the urban “subculture” featured in the film. In all honesty, Kids is an exploitation film in the truest sense with a slight hint of artistry.


I remember becoming interested in Kids at a young age when I heard it was a film featuring skateboarding. When I actually got around to watching the film, I felt both disgusted and humored. I couldn't help but hate the two main wigger skaters, but at the same time find their antics to be retarded poetry. Casper claims to be “the dopest” ghost but really is degenerate filth. It makes one wonder if Justin Pierce, the actor that played Casper, decided to take his own life after realizing his performance in Kids is immortalized forever on celluloid.


One also can’t forget Harold Hunter, the real-life crackhead and professional skateboarder who rode for Zoo York skateboarding company. Mr. Hunter recently died, but thankfully he too has been immortalized in the film. Harold shows he has no shame when he shakes his dick for a group of white girls and boys. He also couldn't care less if a girl tells him to “stop!” Harold Hunter is better known in the skateboard world for his part in the Zoo York Mix-Tape.

Another scene that truly sticks out in my mind is when a group of preteen boys share a blunt together on a coach. They are all lined up by skin color and show their respects to “the savior” Jesus Christ. I couldn’t help but think it was odd that Larry Clark had them all touching each other with their shirts off. Mr. Clark is without doubt a borderline pedophile. Larry has even gone as far as to start skateboarding so he can become part of the “youth” subculture. I guess he really cares for children.


Kids also made me realize that America is really turning into “the third world.” Ever since the film came out over a decade ago, America has had even larger flood of uneducated immigrants. The youth featured in Kids, many of which mongrelized beyond racial recognition, are aimless and worthless. They live to fuck (and produce more unwanted children), get fucked up, and destroy. Destruction seems to really be their only instinct and they do it well. That being said, the only quality these individuals have is their ability to unintentionally entertain. A friend once told me that Kids "burned a hole in his soul” and I couldn’t help but laugh.

-Ty E

Summer Scars

I don't consider this to be a film per say. I see Summer Scars as a re-enactment or documentation on an event that is based on true events, like in America's Most Wanted but with a stunning youthful cast and a budget. In this case, It isn't some word of mouth local legend. The events that transpire in the film are based on a scenario the director himself got caught in as a teenager which brings the chilling realism all too close.


Six rebellious teens knick a moped and meet up in the forest on a day where they should be at school. On this day of hooky, they meet up with a mysterious vagrant who presents himself as a tattered man with a past that is never uncovered. Scenes hint to him being a war veteran, but I can't be for certain. Now the events that took place in Julian Richards childhood appear to be an esoteric situation. I wonder aloud how much of this film is based on true events and which character Richards fit the role of. I can narrow it down to 4 of the 6 preteens.


Summer Scars is synonymous to a wild beast running rampant through a crowded street. Everyone must sacrifice something in order to get through this film cause if the horrifying presence of Kevin Howarth doesn't get to you, the violence directed towards children certainly will. Summer Scars is virtually impossible to review. Bringing it back to my point, It's hard to review due to its substance not really being a film. Clocking in at 67 minutes, it's short, exemplary, and vicious.


Dubious in nature, Summer Scars features all the key points to make this a classy rough thriller. The very pellet gun that Howarth brandishes reminds me of a classic Luger which only adds to the weapons menace. Don't let the cover art fool you. This would be that film you'd pass up in Movie Gallery for looking like another Sundance quickie, but there is more to this film than meets the eye.

-mAQ

Godzilla vs. Hedorah

This is considered to be the most radical spin-off of any Godzilla storyline and I completely agree. As I child, I explicitly remember being brainwashed with educational videos that spoke lightly of imminent destruction of nature if we didn't comply. Such is the case with Godzilla vs. Hedorah and another rare & self-banned Toho classic Prophecies of Nostradamus. The director of Godzilla vs. Hedorah is also the assistant director on Prophecies of Nostradamus, ironically enough.


Godzilla has taken the form of a national icon within the story. The government no longer wants to kill him (as if) and children have taken a liking to him. Humans are a disgusting little bunch as they pollute Godzilla's world past the point of repair. From the sludge that we created comes Hedorah - a slimy creation of pollution. Some spores from a meteor mutated tadpoles in some rampant physiology experiment creating him. Oh yeah, and Godzilla learns how to fly.


Of all the Godzilla films, this is one of the more violent ones. In most of the Lizard's films, the death toll is only implied. You see a city get destroyed and you think to yourself "Wow, many people must have died" but your suspicions are never answered. Hedorah possesses an ability to mist an entire area with sulfuric acid-like vapor killing hundreds of people. He vaporizes and nullifies entire populations. This is quite a morbid piece of hokey eco-fun.


Godzilla is ultimately ineffective to Hedorah. Being a manifestation of sludge, Godzilla's fists go through him leaving his sneaky scales scarred and beaten. It's up to man to stop this creation using a bizarre science experiment charged by the powers of Atomic breath. This is considered the worst Godzilla film, but I don't see it. This film features amazing practical effects not limited to a giant mucky-looking tongue sliming down stairs and retreating, leaving a disgruntled undigested kitten.


Godzilla vs. Hedorah is a completely different formula for a film of its kind. It reminds me of a film translation of those pop-culture children's books that featured characters like He-Man teaching kids to look both ways to cross the street, albeit graphic and nihilistic towards kind souls. In this film you will be subjected to a sing-along environmental song, Godzilla flying through the air, gratuitous violence towards teenage hippies, and Godzilla acting incredibly human. This is one of my favorite Godzilla films I've seen so far.

-mAQ

Rollerball (1975)

Rollerball is what I consider to be a classic. Not a classic in the vain of such films as Citizen Kane or 2001: A Space Odyssey, but a film entirely on it's own. The "extreme sport" subject might be an incredibly familiar subject in pro and con exploitation films but Rollerball produces an entirely organic spin on the subject. Norman Jewison brought to film what could be the cutting-edge sport of the future, not some trivial game that uses the hybrid of flesh and machine.


In this personal future, society isn't glitz & glamour. There's no flying cars or voice-activated refrigerators. Simple fabrics and uniforms breathe life in a game that very well could be with its thought out rule system and view on extreme violence in the media. Rollerball isn't that futuristic game of death to boost ratings - this game is to create a view of futility in individual effort. That is, until Jonathan E. becomes the first man since the halt of the corporate wars to spiral in popularity.


Jonathan E.'s character deals with some trials & tribulations and the theme of this film is his rebellion to an evil corporation. His defiance is not one of the explosive types where he - a single man - barges into HQ armed to the teeth with weapons. He has a gentle defiance to him. His unsatisfied smirk the entire movie reads "You're really an asshole...". He is just a man who has lost it all and chooses to fight back with the only way he knows how to.


Rollerball is a brave visioning of a new world based on a short story. It's regards towards the future and censorship feels awfully similar to that of Fahrenheit 451. Don't let the year 2018 fool you, this future could be highly possible. In a utopia where nobles are referred to as "Executives", this science-fiction monarchy phases me as being unsettling. I don't think I'd sacrifice much for endless luxury. One scene of drug-addled women taking a gun armed with explosives and destroying the last remnants of nature strikes me in too many senses. This masquerade of humanity is far too disquieting, even for my eyes.


Rhetorical female conversations sit upon this films masterpiece. When women aren't being used as spies or moles, they are viewed as lying and cheating whores. E.'s own wife got taken by an Executive but all the reasons for this personal tragedy do not make it acceptable. Females are often viewed in this film destroying beautiful things with a deranged look of sheer madness. Rollerball is a testament to that myth that women love "bad boys" as they themselves have a stark interest in violence.


Rollerball is a classic that fits within it's own confines. It is violent and unflinching and it is the anti-exploitation film to counter the likes of Death Race 2000. I miss the times when social commentary was the film and not a condiment on the side. James Caan plays an amazing performance as his restlessness and inner rage break through his calm exterior. Rollerball is a must-see dystopian piece of 70's cinema.

-mAQ

Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla

Cult status doesn't do much for me. If you tell me a film is praised and glorified for cutting edge low budget entertainment or abstract and obscene imagery, I won't become magnetized to the fad as much as the next fan would be. In case, Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla is not merely just a bad film; it's downright disappointing.


The conflicting and complex story is juicy in details but to continue the food metaphors, is tasteless. A group of scheming aliens are introduced without an introduction. I cannot recall the scene that shows their origin. They just appear with a greasy assassin and plot to steal an ancient statue capable of releasing King Caesar; The only weapon that can destroy MechaGodzilla. I hope King Caesar is in no more films. I don't think I could handle another unwelcome surprise.


Pretty soon, King Caesar (being of fleshy and hairy descent) attempts to take on a giant robotic killing machine made out of space titanium. The very idea of physics allowing enough momentum for the "King" to damage MechaGodzilla flusters my brain and shatters my universe, although the idea of a giant hairy caveman doing battle with a robot lizard is a bit far out as well.


King Caesar's attacking styles rapidly change as well. It's as if the original director jumped ship halfway through and left it up to a rookie to finish. He begins by pummeling Mecha G with his berserker rage, but once Mecha G gets a single hit in, Caesar runs and hides behind a rock waiting for Godzilla to save the day. The prophecy stated that Godzilla would need the help of the King, but it seems that the King needed all the help.


Godzilla's costume is ridiculous in the entry. It looks childish and ligh-hearted. It lacks that product that gives it a scaly lizard look and with gestures that a constipated kick boxer makes, this Godzilla is hardly intimidating. I'd never seen an animal "put up dukes" until this disappointing sequel. For the first appearance of MechaGodzilla - Who had always looked good as an action figure - I found this to be a first impression of the disaster kind. Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla isn't all it was/is hyped up to be.

-mAQ

Godzilla: Tokyo S.O.S.

This is one of the newer films of our generation exploiting the destruction and terror caused by Godzilla. This is the film before Final Wars sealed the franchise temporarily so I went in expecting a film with a heavy dose of CGI, military action, and abnormal and awesome fight scenes. I got what I wanted but I found the basic alignment of the characters to be unnecessary and tedious.


When I bring about positions of war, Godzilla is once again a villain-esque creature after about a 50 year year waiting period. He quickly affirms to old traditions and destroys most of Tokyo before Mothra and the military controlled MechaGodzilla comes onto the battlefield. Just as Puppet Master did with volumes 4 & 5, this film comes as a surprise and vastly differs from previous entries. Perhaps the honorable mention that this film deserves is for stepping on the chaos scale and creating miniature buildings that crumble and break off into a stone like texture which compliments the panic of Tokyo being leveled....again.

Instead of being able to root for Godzilla in the slightest – Which was always possible due to his cemented anti-hero status – I found that the new Godzilla didn’t have a purpose and was just used as the backbone of another Monster Island Faerie Twins driven plot line of some intense hallucination highlighting a disaster that is forthcoming. Supporting the story is a cast of rather annoying pests that swing around hopeless morals as they scurry around the screen; in other words; bad actors.


The fight scenes in question feature an array of personalized combat skills that are relevant to the dire situation these creatures and machines are caught in. Godzilla whipping his tail attempting to wag off one of Mothra’s larvae is a scene that comes to mind. I thank the special effects team greatly for increasing the production value which in turn boosts the fluidity of the monster movements and creates for a visually stunning Kaiju film.


Godzilla: Tokyo S.O.S. is a conflicted film unsure of how it views its country’s own mascot. Godzilla is a tender soul driven mad by the scum that inhabits his world. This is a great action popcorn sequel but I find nothing that could be used to drive the lore of Godzilla further other than the incredible scar that lines his rib cage or the after credit sequence which leaves an Alien Resurrection feel to it morphing a Godzilla film into a true Science-fiction mythos.

-mAQ