Hellraiser: Hellworld

What Curse of the Puppet Master did for the franchise, Hellraiser: Hellworld attempts to do for its own withering fable of the Cenobites and their excessive philosophies of pleasure and pain. While I appreciate the levelheadedness of Rick Bota, director of the last three entries, Hellraiser: Hellworld plays out as more of a psychological slasher/revenge tale and has about as much to do with Pinhead as Friday the 13th: A New Beginning had to do with Jason Voorhees. In this adaption of Clive Barker's characters, the Cenobites go digital as a group of "hardcore Internet gamers" rendezvous at a red-lit house party hosted by Lance Henriksen and have to fight to stay alive. Or rather, try to have sex with everyone and fall into half-assed traps.


Now for someone who has experimented with online games, the Hellworld title appears to had little or no thought put into it. A shoddy first-person door layout ala early Resident Evil titles accompanies all of the gameplay and for me, a video game enthusiast, seeing something so dreadful being taken seriously is as bad as watching two kids attempt to play FFVIII in Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle. The typical attractive teenage peril is employed as is with the rest of the slasher genre. Hellraiser: Hellworld isn't anything special but unlike some of the more wretched cash-ins, this one ain't too bad. Hellworld also does an exemplary job at usurping your wanted attention and wasting it on something as banal as an eighth entry in a series that should have ceased to exist after the second.



To start on my riffing, any recent film with Lance Henriksen is bound to be your typical straight-to-video 'sploitation title chock full of terrible unknown actors in hopes to revitalize forgotten sagas. Or the track record of sub par quality, perhaps these are all just quick money-makers catering to the horror completists. Either way, both crunch out a profit at the disdain of the intellectually challenged consumer. Now don't get me wrong, Hellraiser: Hellworld is a piece of under-produced shit but it still manages the simple task of guilty entertainment. I found the first 20 minutes to drag on as my hand slid down my face while I sporadically groaned but once the virtual inconsistencies ceased to pan out, I found myself a lot more capable of handling the latest Cenobite venture. Needless to say, the usual duo appears; Pinhead and Chatterer, along with several converted characters. I have always found myself so disappointed in any incarnation of Chatterer past the first two Hellraiser films. The clicking of the ghoulish creature's bicuspids ground my nerves down to chalk in the same fashion that the White Rabbit's bite in Svankmajer's Alice did.


I haven't seen most of the "unofficial" Hellraiser films but I'm making it a personal goal to wrap viewing them all up within the next month. Clive Barker emerged with a vision, as demented and hellish as it was, and it exploded with flavor. While it was a bitter and cruel experiment on film, the ideas of which he presented were entirely his own. Past the second film, plot devices and similar tortures are just retreaded. The neck wound on the Female cenobite is repeated in almost every film as I can see and the similar chain effects are thrown in for good, nostalgic measure. Only the short film No More Souls dared to provide "new flesh" to Clive Barker's masterful carving of a puzzle box and the entities that lie within. For directors to mold artistic inspiration into something as simple as psychosexual philosophical musings shouldn't be too hard but in today's day & age, this fact seems quite impossible. As I have said, Hellraiser: Hellworld is a pile of rubbish that didn't leave me with regrets, but I'm quite sure some of the other entries will. Until then, a capable time-waster.

-mAQ

Invocation of My Demon Brother

Invocation of My Demon Brother seems to be Kenneth Anger’s most glossed over film. I find the short to be one that I keep coming back to. I just can’t get enough of real-life convicted killer Bobby Beausoleil and his suave top hat. Beausoleil would later go on to kill a worthless hippy-wannabe-Buddhist drug dealer. One would be a liar if they didn’t admit that Bobby Beausoleil’s acting and actions are certainly a contribution to this dying world. I also enjoyed seeing Anton LaVey when he was in his prime and still dressing up as a sort of carny Satan. I just find it kind of odd to see LaVey in Kenneth Anger’s world of Aleister Crowley and Thelema. Rolling Stones mouthpiece Mick Jagger also deserves praise for the synthesizer score he created for Invocation of My Demon Brother. Sympathy for the Devil, indeed.

Invocation of My Demon Brother opens with a young albino man that seems to have problems with his eyes. It is probably all the naked homos in the shadows that have haunted him. This young albino is a very aesthetically unappealing individual that looks like the bastard hate child of a Germanic barbarian warrior and a degenerate Mongolian thief. Maybe this fellow has eye trouble because he looked too closely at himself in Kenneth Anger's mirror. I wouldn’t be surprised if this fellow is one of Kenneth Anger’s ex-boyfriends who Anger would later put one of his infamous spells on. Either way, this blond haired untermensch is surely a creep.

Kenneth Anger certainly embarrassed himself in Invocation of My Demon Brother with his undeniably flaming gay performance in a sparkle covered red robe. Anger flaunts a magic wand with a sort of flamboyance that would put Richard Simmons to shame. Kenneth Anger also waves around a swastika flag which I found interesting considering Anger (Anglemyer)’s dubious ancestral background. Despite Kenneth Anger being the black magician lead of the short, Anton LaVey steals the show just by hovering over a skull and some candles. Invocation of My Demon Brother is as close to a marriage as there will be between The Church of Satan and Aleister Crowley’s Thelema.

Despite his sympathy for the devil, Mick Jagger’s concert performance footage brings a “heavenly” feel to the world of Invocation of My Demon Brother. Mick is probably the most innocent of these black artists and also the most famous. I wouldn’t be surprised if Mick Jagger’s attraction to the work of Kenneth Anger was primarily fueled by his strong thirst for vice. I must say that I am happy that Beausoleil, LaVey, Anger, and Jagger got together and made a short film like no other. Invocation of My Demon Brother certainly invoked a celebration of the demon in myself.

-Ty E

The Wanderers

Films about gangs and criminals have no doubt attracted degenerate youth all across America. These are films where young gangstas find their true models and messiahs. To see this pathetic trend, one only has to go to an urban area (and most rural areas) on a busy day and see how many youths are sporting a Scarface or 50 Cent shirt. Call me crazy, but I think Tony Montana is a piece of erratic trash (that ultimately fails). I am also not sure whether or not I would even give 50 Cent the title of “Sub-Man” because he just seems much lower than that. Sadly, to the bottom feeding males of our society, criminals with money are always going to be their greatest heroes because that is as best as these individuals (that lack individuality) can strive for. I do believe, however, that all young males (no matter what type of background) form a “gang” in some form or manner, as it is natural. The “gang” members featured in the 1979 film The Wanderers are certainly of a more “mellow” nature.

The main gang featured in The Wanderers is a group of young Italian-Americans greasers known as “The Wanderers.” This gang is not full of your typical dego wops, but a more “gentle” group of garlic lovers. I was looking for something more stereotypical of these gangster Italian-Americans, but they ultimately act like a bunch of whiney Jews who complain about not being able to get laid. Maybe Martin Scorsese should have directed The Wanderers instead of Philip Kaufman. Despite The Wanderers gang being the main gang in the film, I found myself more interested in the lesser shown gangs.

The Fordham Baldies is the “toughest” gang in The Wanderers. These guys are sort of proto-skinhead types that sport leather jackets to match their equally shiny shaved heads. This gang seems to be a mixture of WASP types with a token beefy Negro for good measure. Although the Baldies are much more interesting than the Wanderers, my favorite gang in The Wanderers is easily the Duck Boys. The Duck Boys are an all Irish gang of silent psychopath leprechauns that sport raggedy working-class clothes. This gang of murdering Catholics gave a new meaning to the no longer used word “mick.” The other two gangs featured in The Wanderers, The Wongs (Chinese) and The Del Bombers (Black), were of really no interest.

The Wanderers was a film that obviously attempted to make something nostalgic out of early 1960s NYC gangs. Unfortunately, the film was too weak in it’s portrayal of that era. Still, I found The Wanderers to be a breath of fresh area in comparison to your contemporary “KILLZ EVREE MUDHA FUCKA” gang film that has become so common in Hollywood. I know the producers in Hollywood have no interest in criminal violence (only white collar stuff), so why do they find it so necessary to expose already degenerate youths to it?!?

-Ty E

The Manson Family

Very few films fit into a category all alone. Jim Van Bebber’s The Manson Family is one of those oh so rare films. Is The Manson Family a docudrama meant to scare the shit out of audiences so they realize the gruesomeness and depravity of the slaughters committed by “the family?” Or is The Manson family a mockumentary about the brainwashed idiocy that Charles Manson indoctrinated his loyal followers with? Or even more to the point, is The Manson Family a film to have fun to and watch while stoned on weed and/or intoxicated on alcohol? In my humble opinion, I believe the film to be whatever you make of it. It seems that director Jim Van Bebber does not have any serious or concrete ideas as to why he made this cinematic masterpiece of Americana mayhem. Thankfully, The Manson Family was actually finished after about 15 years of production.

Jim Van Bebber makes no lie that real sex and drugs went down during the filming of The Manson Family. While watching the film, it is apparent real-life hedonism was to the realist advantage of the film. Despite how silly and goofy some of the family members seem in the film, I certainly felt that the actors lent a certain authenticity that most films about “true crime” lack. The Manson Family also has a psychedelic feeling that allows the viewer to become pseudo-disenchanted with reality and in tune with the nonsensical world of The Manson Family. I once screened the film for a bunch of young drunk rednecks and they became so agitated with the film that they aggressively made me turn it off. It was apparent that while watching The Manson Family, that these rednecks saw something about themselves they didn’t like. Keep in mind that these young men were both drunk and stoned.

Of course, like virtually every other film ever made, The Manson Family has its flaws. The most glaring being the added subplot of contemporary Manson fans and their unnatural obsession with Sex, Drugs, and “Rock N Roll.” Even many of the actors that played The Manson family members were disappointed with this added group of bottom feeding losers. The subplot of contemporary Manson fans conspiring to kill a “piggy producer” just comes off as a stupid (and hopefully unintended) message about Manson’s negative influence on American young adults. If I wanted to find about that, I would read Vincent Bugliosi’s Helter Skelter. I figure that Jim Van Bebber added the new and unimproved footage so that The Manson Family would be at a longer running time.

I believe that The Manson Family is Jim Van Bebber’s masterpiece. Honestly, I don’t see the guy topping this film. Heck, I don’t know if I can even see Jim Van Bebber completing another feature length film. When I watch Van Bebber’s exciting and very unconventional action-packed film Deadbeat at Dawn, I see a promising director that looks like he will eventually make headlines in the future. Sadly, however it seems that drugs and alcohol have consumed too much of Jim Van Bebber’s life for him to put his “all” into filmmaking. Honestly, after each time watching The Manson Family, it does not surprise me that it took two decades for Jim Van Bebber to complete two modest budget (but superb) films. Maybe if we take a bowl hit in tribute to Satan, that might change things?

-Ty E

Lakeview Terrace

I absolutely loathe Samuel L. Jackson. For some reason, when I see him on a TV screen I just wish that his head would explode (kind of like in Cronenberg's Scanners) during one of those moments where he acts “uppity.” I have also never found Mr. Jackson to be “cool” nor have I ever felt that most of those “cool” films that he has starred in have been of any quality. I once explained to a burnt out hippie type why I felt that Black Snake Moan was easily one of the most degenerate stylized pieces of cancerous filth that I had ever seen. Naturally, the hippie fuck was baffled and just continued to talk about why he thought Samuel L. Jackson was so “bad assss.”


There is one performance featuring Samuel L. Jackson that I do appreciate and it happens to be in the universally hated film Lakeview Terrace. Of course, Lakeview Terrace is your typical Hollywood high quality (as in high priced) dung, but it features SLJ in a new type of role. Jackson plays a racist cop that hates race mixing and “progressive” types. When an interracial couple moves next door to this black racist cop, things start to get excitingly politically incorrect. Not only does SLJ hate race mixing, but he also hates wiggers that spend their wasted days loitering parking lots.

From my personal experience, I have encountered two types of black cops: lovable uncle toms (like Sgt. Al Powell in Die Hard) and angry racist black cops. SLJ does a superb job playing the latter type of cop and he also demonstrates a valuable point. The masses love Samuel L. Jackson when he’s a belligerent criminal unloading bullets into people, yet they hate him when he’s a belligerent criminal cop unloading bullets into other criminals. Are blacks only cool to the masses when they are criminals (or "messiahs")? Why is a black criminal cop something to be despised yet many times black gangsta crack dealers are considered cool?

Hollywood loves to romanticize over “minority” criminals and the masses love these imaginary criminals even more in return. In Lakeview Terrace, a black man holds a decent job and supports his family (as a single father) but is made out to be the ultimate villain. Of course, Hollywood is run by “men” that lack more than a little testosterone and hate to see a man that actually is responsible for his family. After all, isn’t it fascist and misogynistic for a man to run a household nowadays? According to Lakeview Terrace, “being a man” might even lead you to trying to kill interracial couples. Hollywood certainly knew how to channel Samuel L. Jackson’s “cool” uppity behavior and utilize it to demonstrate the PURE EVIL of a Negro dats gotta job!

-Ty E

Year of the Dragon

Imagine a crime thriller starring the young, angelic face of Mickey Rourke and add a touch of a belligerent dose of terrible violence. Not the accustomed violence we're given through modern media in that pampering and stylized manner that we're subjected to on a daily basis. No smoke and mirrors here, Year of the Dragon features a stark and in-your-face style of dealing with death and injury. Close-up shots of fatal wounds and selfish tragedy are given by Michael Cimino using his sleight of hand acquired from the Oscar-winning Deer Hunter and such adds the illusion of a neon-lit gangster epic set in Chinatown. With epic as the term I use to describe this film, know that the running time and the pacing conjures the thought of this being an epic and not what consists of the actual underlayings fo the film. From my hiatus of writing was born a love of the way classic films were created and in this, and not to play devil's advocate, I find the classic aesthetic of crime capers to be consistently more fulfilling than the bravest structured contemporary film around.


Mickey Rourke, as per usual, grabs the attention of all who view this film. There is no supporting cast or honorable mentions, there is only . Your gaze will be transfixed on a 30 year old Rourke playing a 50-something year old Vietnam vet. Analyze this, Harley Davidson & the Marlboro Man without Mickey Rourke would be as caring for a child that isn't your biological spawn. Sure, the instinct for parental nurturing would still exist as would the film Harley Davidson but the passion and excitement from the adventures of a former A-list actor would be void. Face it, it would harness the credibility of a recent Dolph Lundgren Straight-to-DVD title (Sorry, Dolph.) For a film of its nature, you'd think that press, no, even cult film lovers could approach this film open-armed but it appears that Year of the Dragon has been shunned into obscurity because of "an offending portrait of Chinese-Americans." Never mind the blurb at the opening of the film disregarding all "stereotypes" portrayed in this film. Since then, Year of the Dragon has never sat well with the chinks and please, disregard their portrayal of the "white demon." For once I wish I could write something as loud and angry as Cimino's Year of the Dragon. Rather, Rourke's Year of the Dragon.



Audience discrepancies will linger after the foul approach of showing the Chinese-Americans as being the soulless parasites they are. Moving over to our country and adopting their thousand year old traditions in a place of law and justice. This doesn't sit will with Captain Stanley White as he endangers his own life and the life of all who care for him as Year of the Dragon explodes into a rip wave of unexplainable bloodshed and shocking climaxes at every turn. Captain Stanley White is the most bizarre of protagonists. Layered plentifully, the more we learn about his character, the more solace we garner and the more trust we put in his judgment. Then when the proverbial shit hits the fan, we find ourselves reaching out to silence his continuing mistakes and realize that he isn't the great guy we thought he was, over and over again. And that is just one of the reasons that I feel Year of the Dragon is a marvelous film for what it is - an effervescently chaotic scripture of backwards racism and the perfect amount of needed misogyny.


I occasionally dine at Chinese/Japanese buffets and sit baffled wondering where in context could the harmonic, yet infuriating, mandarin music could be properly squeezed into its soothing and proper effect. Year of the Dragon sporadically incorporates these similar sounds while perusing through the extensive Chinese crime families while heavy percussion accompany most of the Polack-American scenes of brutal detective work. A gripe comes to mind when assessing the Chinese half of the film, it's not so much as a gripe with Year of the Dragon but my own inability to maintain memories on which Lee-Hung family belongs to which Triad while Johnny Cho is out with Walter Wang. Since Tremors debuted some time ago and devastated the rental market, I've found myself lampooning the similarly named Chinamen. As I stated, my problem but my personal fulfillment as well. Ariane's perfomance didn't help my intolerable Oriental condition either, with her performance as wooden as my love for Legally Blonde spinoffs.

(Pictured left to right, Lone, Woo, Chin, Wong, Wang....or something)

In conclusion, Year of the Dragon is a rousing and voracious view into stereotyped crime syndicates. So much may be true while the rest lingers upon notations hidden in books long forgotten but that's the problem with adaptations and their "contemporary redesignings," so you'll see little complaint from me. To call Year of the Dragon "racist" is to say Tom Hanks has too much screen time in Cast Away. These media vultures love digging for subversion and uprooting it into some big fiasco. Attention whores, all of them! Year of the Dragon isn't an intelligent film per say, but an emotional one for sure. Many times throughout this gem I found myself appraising Captain Stanley White for being such a cool cat while the other times I felt as if a similar tragedy were shared psychically. That right there is one of the many definitions of movie magic.

-mAQ

SS will return shortly...

-Ty E and mAQ