The Last House on the Left (2009)

Wes Craven’s The Last House on the Left (1972) was one of first “exploitation” style horror films I had ever seen so it is a film that has stuck with me over the years. Not that the film is a masterpiece or anything, but the film was brutal for its time. I always get disgusted watching the film and seeing the criminal Krug, played by “good Jewish boy” (his mother’s own words) David Hess playing the role of a criminal “leader.” Last House on the Left is full of unflattering nudity and less than sexy sex, unnecessary violence, and just plain “bad” stuff that Craven rubs in the viewer's face with the utmost malice. Wes Craven sure made the right decision when he decided to quit his career as a liberal college professor and take up the career of trash filmmaking. After over 25 years since the original release of Last House on the Left, Craven decided to produce the remake of his own “legendary” film.


Obviously, I am not a fan of this continuing trend of horror remakes. That being said, I did not have to think hard to realize that the remake of Last House on the Left is my favorite of these “updating” of horror “classics.” Let’s face it, the original Last House on the Left was a horribly made and pathetically directed (if you can call it that) film. The power of the film lies in its sometimes realism and brutal nature. Naturally, the bigger budget update of Last House on the Left is fine tuned and more solidly constructed. Of course the remake lacks the “realism” of the original film for a cinema experience that is more “easy on the eyes.”


The biggest flaw for me in the Last House on the Left remake is Krug. No one can beat David Hess in his ability to play a sociopath criminal. I wouldn’t be surprised if Hess had the relatives that were in charge of the Gulags in the Soviet Union. Whereas the Krug in the original Last House on the Left is more of a poor intercity criminal Jew type, the Krug in the update is more of a white trash/trailer park type. Although I hated the new Krug and felt joy during his brutal death, nothing beats the hatred I felt for David Hess. All the other characters, although different, were at least as interesting as the original. I just wish Krug’s sidekick bull dyke was more of a carpet muncher in the remake. There are very few things more repulsive than a criminally minded lesbian.


Unsurprisingly, my viewing of Last House on the Left, courtesy of mad dog mAQ, was packed with snickering colored folk. Once again, they added much more entertainment to the film. I especially enjoyed it when a certain character in Last House on the Left ends up having his head blown off. During this scene, a black brotha in the audience responded with “dats a crackhead.” So, was the remake of Last House on the Left a revolutionary piece of filmmaking? Hell no. The film, however, is a good way to waste just under two hours of your spare time if you have it. I bet my boy Negro smiley enjoyed it.

-Ty E